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Some time ago, I accompanied a friend to a conference at a hotel, where he was scheduled to meet someone. While waiting for him in the lobby area just outside one of the conference halls, I sat quietly, scrolling through my phone and minding my business. After a while, I noticed people going in and out of the hall beside me. Curiosity made me look up. A PhD defense was ongoing, I wasn’t really paying attention until I heard gentle clapping from inside the hall. Then came the turn of a middle-aged man, probably in his late 50s. He stood at the front with a soft, shaky demeanor. He spoke slowly, carefully picking his words. Every few sentences, he paused.. not for effect, but because he stuttered. Still, each time he managed to get through a point, the audience clapped.. not out of pity, but in admiration and respect. Toward the end, his voice broke. He asked everyone to kindly rise for a minute silence in honor of his wife, who had recently passed away. And in that moment of silence, he broke down in tears. What I learned afterward left me speechless. The man had only a diploma in Business Administration when he got married. His wife, a successful banker, pushed him to go back to school. She supported him through a BSc, then a master’s, and finally the PhD program he was now completing. But just months before he would earn the title “Doctor,” his wife lost her life to breast cancer. He was shattered. She had been his strength, his motivation, and his helper. She had even taken time off her busy banking schedule to help him share questionnaires during his research. Though she herself had only a master’s degree, she pushed her husband beyond that point, right up to the very top. Now here he was, defending his thesis without her beside him. That’s when I truly understood the kind of love that doesn’t compete, the kind of spouse who gives you wings to fly without fear of your success. Not everyone is lucky to have such a partner, one who celebrates your growth, fights for your dream like it’s theirs, and stands by you even when life tries to break you. #knowledge #Blessing

The Chinese proverb Ask a question, and you're a fool for five minutes. Don't ask a question; you are a fool for the rest of your life. This proverb highlights the importance of asking questions and seeking knowledge, rather than remaining ignorant due to fear of temporary embarrassment. #Ngo_123 #grace

I have Dominion! #Knowledge

4 months after I was born, my mom went back to University to get her degree. I'm her third child. She left me and my siblings with our Dad and paternal grandma and came home only weekends for three years until she finished her degree. She left 3 under-5 and went to pursue her career. At 28, she was doing her NYSC and pregnant with her 4th child. At 40, she already had her master's degree. She has been a civil servant since 1993. Now, at 61, she is at the peak of her career. A level 17 officer, Permanent Secretary grade. (Edit - Note: in 2023, Delta State increased retirement age from 60 to 65.) My aunty who was my mother's secondary mate and got married same year my mother got married, didn't continue with her education like my mom did. She had three children and tried to go back in her 40s when her last child was in secondary school, but she was only able to acquire tc2 (or whatever they call it). At the long run. My mom raised four successful biological children. My aunty raised three successful biological children. No, my aunty's children did NOT turn out better just because she gave up career and dreams to raise them. If you are measuring success based on wealth and quality and level of education, we are far ahead. There are no studies, research or statistics that indicate that children of stay-at-home mothers do better. If I could be asked to choose between an illiterate mother who stayed at home throughout my childhood and gave up career just to watch me VERSUS my mother who is a top/senior civil servant at the peak of her career, a boss in the office and boss at home, I would DEFINITELY choose the latter, and I'm glad that the latter is my reality. My father told me that he had opportunity to travel to the US or UK when I was just four. He was to travel there for research and enroute into becoming a university lecturer/professor. But he turned down the opportunity because he wanted to be there to watch his children grow every minute. Do you know what I told him? I told him that he should have gone. Some of my siblings also told him he should have gone. Imagine the children he stayed for telling him that he should have gone. My father's colleague who also got same offer went and came back for his family one year later. So, I told my father that leaving his family for a year or two would have been a worthwhile sacrifice to pay for a better future. He should have gone and come back for us a year or two later. My father was a very successful man, more educated than my mother and also got to the peak of his career, but not half as successful as he would have been if he had taken some risks, including leaving his children for a year or two. Why am I writing all these? For those women who abandon their dreams, careers and aspirations because of their children. Someday, your children who you abandoned your career for will ask you WHY? They will tell you that you should have pursued your career. Like I said, my father sacrificed career progression for us his children. My mother did NOT sacrifice career pursuit for anybody. While I understand the sacrifice my father made, as a grown adult, I still think my mother made the better choice. So, my dear women/mothers, I can tell you that at the long run, your children would be most proud of you if you pursue your career and achieve great career heights. I went back to full-time studies January to December 2024. I had my daughter in-between in April 2024. I got an extra degree and with that, I'm applying for jobs and negotiating salaries more than twice my salary in my last job. It wasn't easy doing that while nursing a baby, but I did it. My children would grow up seeing a strong mommy who didn't abandon her dreams. I want my daughter to know that she should never abandon her dream or chosen career for any reason or anyone. I don't want my children to ask me WHY? It's not easy combining academic/career and family. But nothing good comes too easily. Just do your best within your power and the opportunity and resources available to you. Copied ✍️

#abimfolu #grace THE HARE AND THE TORTOISE Once, there was a hare who was best friends with a tortoise. The hare was very proud of how fast he could run, so one day, he challenged the tortoise to a race. The tortoise agreed, even though everyone thought he was way too slow to win. The race began, and the hare raced so fast that he was far ahead of the tortoise. Feeling confident, the hare decided to take a nap under a tree while the tortoise kept going, step by step. When the hare woke up, he was shocked to see the tortoise crossing the finish line. The tortoise had won the race! Moral of the story: It doesn’t matter how fast or strong you are—what matters is being steady and never giving up. And don’t be too proud, it can cause trouble!

Somehow, we humans forgot that we are one big family. Let's remind the world again. That we can do everything in love again. #Happiness #Ini

That his grace which have been sustaining me I appreciate him for it

If you forget your old friends because of your new position, you will definitely make new friends that will forget you after the position....Be wise.. #Justalittleadvice #Subewo2015

No girl runs faster than a girl with make-up 💄 when it's raining #PeaceOfMind

Ruby OOP threw me for a loop. 🧠 Everything's an object even classes?🙄 📚 Had to combine docs + videos + irb experiments.😩😒 But now I get it👌: ✅ initialize, ✅ instance variables, ✅ object vs class #codingjourney #rubyonrails #tessy_rich #Favour